For context. I had a baby 13 years ago (as a teen) and am currently pregnant with my second. My best friend had a baby last year. We live 2 states apart, and I have been the one making the effort to visit on a monthly basis. Partly to visit family, but we always set aside time for my best friend. The past 3 years we have been living out of state, she has never once come to visit us. In that time frame, she has gone on a trip to Spain, Colorado, and most recently, a vacation to Hawai’i. She did plan on visiting the first year and then canceled last minute. After her dancing around an answer of when she would reschedule the visit when I asked her, it was clear that she really didn’t want to.
While that bothers me, what bothers me more is that she always seems to expect me to respond to her on her time frame.
Sometimes she will text me (btw she only texts me during the day when she’s at work) and I cannot respond or if I am upset since this is hurtful and need a some time to respond, I will sometimes respond the next day. This leads to her asking me if I am mad at her. When I’ve asked her before to visit, she said couldn’t because they got a dog and then had a baby. And while I get those things, as I have literally been there by myself, I never failed to be there for her or make time for her.
Now that I am pregnant with my second, I do not feel obligated to go out of my way anymore for her. I feel like 3 years has been plenty.
AITA for no longer feeling obligated to accommodating her?