I am the father of a 17f. We live in a fairly well-off area of a developing nation meaning my daughter has been afforded all opportunities. She wants to go to college in the US, like I did in the past, and study journalism. I started a college fund years ago to pay for that. I also have a niece the same age, who's been living in the US for 4 years since she got into an exclusive boarding school there. Her mother, my sister, and her husband, are less economically stable than I, so I've been helping them with the cost.
Both my daughter and my niece have applied to colleges, and my daughter got into a few lesser-known, high acceptance rate schools, whereas my niece got into multiple Ivies and other top-tier schools like Berkeley and UCLA. My niece reached out to me and said that as an international student, she didn't get much aid (a lot of top colleges are really stingy with aid for internationals and also don't offer academic scholarships), and asked me if I could possibly help out. She included the financial aid options for her cheapest option (Brown), and it amounted to the same as what it would cost my daughter to attend college in the US. I thought about the following:
* My daughter is weak in terms of speaking English. English is widely spoken in my country, she goes to schools where they teach and interact in English, she's had English tutors, and I've spoken English with her, but she still finds it very hard despite the immersion to communicate in English. Journalism is inherently is based off, in the US, the English language. For this reason, I've told her in the past that if she doesn't improve her English, I would think twice about sending her to the US. She agreed, but hasn't shown any improvement in years. I've tried helping her, but she always remains adamant nothing is wrong yet doesn't show any progress.
* My niece, on the other hand did 4 years at a rigorous prep school in the US, and got good enough grades to get into Ivies and other top tier schools. This shows she can easily succeed in an english-speaking environment.
* My niece and daughter's tuition are about the same and it seems like it's worth it more to put it towards an Ivy education than a school with an 80% acceptance rate.
So I decided I would pay my niece's tuition. I told her that she would be paid for instead of my daughter, and she accepted. I let my daughter know, and she got upset. I told her this shouldn't come as a surprise because I let her know two years ago that is she didn't improve her english skills to a satisfactory level, I would reconsider sending her to the US. I then offered two options-- she could still go to the US but take out loans, or go to a college in our country. It's not the US, but our country still has major cities with 5+ million people, culture, nightlife, and glamor. They would cost far less than college in the US. She chose the latter option, but thinks I'm TA. I don't think so, because I already let her know this was on the table.