My mother remarried a couple of years ago. My stepdad has 5 kids, 4 of whom have moved out but his youngest; Daniel (20m) has moved back to our house while at uni to save money. This also turned out to be the best option for me, so I (19f) am now living with them.
Daniel and I have a lot of issues with each other. We were good friends when we were in middle school and that's how our parents met. We both had a crush on each other and we'd hang out all the time but he always liked to pick fights with me so we stopped being friends.
Living together has not been easy. I had been holed up in my room studying for the most part and whenever I left my room he made it his number one mission to get on my nerves, when I showed almost no reaction, it escalated. He started coming into my room at 5 am to wake me up by blasting music, hiding my laptop so that I can't do my work, and making rude comments to me and about me.
Last week we got into a fight about him hiding my laptop again and I said some rude things which I'm not proud of. We didn't talk and he didn't do anything for a couple of days. A day after our argument I gave my laptop to my little sister who needed to borrow it. Two days ago I went on my laptop to continue writing the book that I've been writing for two years, it's just something I do on my off time. When I logged on, all of it was gone. Planning, 50 fully written chapters, editing, all of it.
I was devastated. I asked my sister about it and she said that she lent the laptop to Daniel because he said he needed to send an email to his professor on it and his wasn't working. I knew he deleted it. I spent the whole night crying and trying to find anything that I could salvage.
That brings us to yesterday, his birthday. I was fully prepared to scream and break all of his shit but I calmed myself down and thought the confrontation could wait. He was out all day so I didn't have to see him and my mom prepared a homecooked meal for all of us to enjoy.
He came home and I tried to keep it civil until we were setting up the dining table together and he was making his usual pesky comments about my boyfriend and my friends. I was staying quiet and not saying anything to try and contain my anger. Then, he decided that his usual comments weren't rude enough and started talking about my choice to study law and how women don't belong in the workplace but in the kitchen. That was it for me. I started yelling, cursing, and I accused him of deleting my book which he then admitted to. Our family came into the room and once I said my piece I grabbed my coat and left for my friend's house.
My family has been calling me and texting me angry about how I ruined the party and saying that I shouldn't have lashed out as I did. They are all on his side and are making me think I'm crazy for being angry. I know that I shouldn't have made a scene and said the things that I said but he knew how I would react to his comments and he knew how important my book was to me. AITA?