Hi reddit,
My brother & sister-in-law recently got married. They couldn't afford a big wedding so they did a court wedding and had the reception at their home. They are trying to save enough money to buy a house. Also they are trying to plan for a honeymoon. Now, I work for a University in Honolulu and have a small home there. I live alone. I am pretty well off financially. My sister-in-law has always dreamed of going to Hawaii but they cannot afford to travel here. They can spend maximum $1000 on a honeymoon. They both work low skilled minimum wage jobs.
Many of my relatives have asked me about staying over at my house when they visit Hawaii to save on travel expenses. My answer has always been No. My reasoning is; I have alot of relatives. If I say yes to one person; I have to say yes to everyone. Soon enough; there will be someone visiting and staying over at my house every month. I won't have peace in my own home. I'll have to be the host; tending to everyone's needs. Be a tour guide. It's one thing if they are in Hawaii and comes to my house for a visit. But another things for them to stay over for 1-3 weeks.
My sister-in-law asked me the question some years ago and I had told her no. Now they are planning for a honeymoon and so she decides to bring up the subject DURING a family gathering after the wedding. Again; I say no. My family then tries convince me to grant them an exception because its their honeymoon and I have 2 empty bedrooms in my house. And because they are only looking to stay for 2 weeks. And that I dont need to do anything and they will 'just be there and out of my hair' . I should note that my brother understand my need for privacy and has never bothered me about this issue.
Then I explicitly tell them NO; I don't care how many bedrooms I have, I simply do not want to host anyone at my home for weeks. I KNOW that I will be expected to be a host regardless of what they say. I can't just go about my business and pretend they aren't there. I also suggested they look at cheaper vacations that fit their budget. Honeymoon doesn't have to be at Hawaii. It can be within the same province.. rent a cottage for 1 or 2 weeks.. Idk.. Now my sister in law is being distant and cold to me. It doesnt really bother me too much because I never cared for this entitled bitch to begin with. But I always been fair and civil to her because I love my brother.
AITA reddit?