So backstory, my parents bought a cottage/second house when I was 9 (I’m now 21) so that we could be closer to their family. I spent my summers there until I graduated high school. I did not really like it there, I never had any friends and my older sibling stopped spending as much time there when they were in HS. So, besides my mom I spent a lot of time there alone and lonely.
I know I was lucky and privileged but it was really hard being that alone at times. So, when I was seventeen, I probably did make a fuss about never wanting to go back but I mean we all knew I would have to return at some point.
So anyway, right after I leave my mom paints the floor of my room. They are old wood floors that are painted, and mine were but I had never let my mom repaint them for almost a decade because I didn’t hated the look of the white floor being freshly painted. I also refused to let her fill the knot holes cause I also didn’t like the way that looked and it was my room. They are now all filled in and which makes me want to scratch my brain. (For the record I do know this is a bit odd but I’m pretty sure now my aversion as to do with my anxiety disorder. Although I never framed it like that to my parents I was very vocal on the fact that I hated the freshly painted floors)
Anyway then my parents gave away my bed without asking. Only telling me a few weeks after it was done. They acted like it was no big deal but I started crying and was angry for weeks after, I thought they understood these changes were upsetting me. I also told them directly that if they wanted to change my room again to please ask before. They said they would.
I haven’t gotten back because Covid and university but my parents have and my mom redid their bedroom. She sends me a video and like literally half of her “new” furniture is just mine repainted. She has taken the chair and the bedside table. They also stripped everything on the walls off and I assume shoved it in my sibling’s room but I literally do not know what has been kept and what has just disappeared.
IEvery time I think about it I get hot all over and want to cry. I think it might because my parents have not touched my siblings stuff. Their room might be a bit of storage room but nothing has been painted or taken from them without their permission. I just makes me feel uncared for which I know it’s true but I can’t stop feeling and thinking that they just didn’t respect me enough to care about my stuff and the way I liked my space.
So would I be the asshole for trying to talk to my parents about this or should I just let it be? As I might be needlessly bringing something up that could hurt my parents.
I have expressed my upset before so it’s not like they don’t know this upset me but every time I have talked about this everyone acts like I’m being petty or overreacting? (I’ve also never really expressed how it made me feel other then upset)