I(33M) lost my parents at 23,when I was at medical school due to a traffic accident. After that,I was in a deep depression and if it weren't my advisor in Medical School,I wouldn't have been in the world. He and his wife got me into their home,took care of me and I graduated medical school and residency while I was living with them.
My birth family only attended the funeral,helped me to arrange the stuff and left in a week. I was always an outcast in the family for not continuing in the family business so it wasn't surprising but they didn't treat me bad,we just had nothing in common and they didn't know what to do with me. They all lived in a similar social circle but I never participated in their things,I was mostly at Library or at School. Basically I didn't have a social life and it showed at the family events so I stopped participating.
At my last year of residency at 2020 January,I met with my guy,we became lovers after our first date and at our meeting anniversary this year,he proposed to me and I said yes. We are getting married in June and we will only have a ceremony, take some photos and then we will go to our honeymoon. There will be also a rigid seating plan due to the capacity of the venue and multiple people attending the ceremony. Everyone will have assigned seats with a seat number.
The problem is,when the wedding venue asked who will act my as my close family,I told my advisor and his wife. They don't have kids and they see their students as their kids so I thought it would be a nice gift to them. Than the behind 2 rows were reserved for the professors and their family who raised me during medical school and residency than I had my relatives. After I sent the invitations with the seat numbers,a cousin recognized that place and he told everyone they were seated at the back rows and they started to call me out of in the social media for being a "traitor and an abomination to the family." (My fiancés birth family are Jehovah's Witnesses so you can easily say they are not in his life. He was kicked out and effectively disowned when he was 18 for coming out as gay in high school and he only saw his brother once at a work related event and he walked directly besides him and he never acknowledged him (they are both lawyers))Am I really that level asshole?